Go Ask Alice

My senior year I skipped lunch (anxiety?) and would hide out in the huge ancient window seats of our library. I'd read the dirtiest and grittiest things I could find. I'd look for things that were shocking to peruse: art books, novels, poetry collections, histories of war and massacre, things of substance.

I found this book in our highschool library. It captured me with its plain black cover and anonymous author. I was hooked from the first chapter into the woven world of a young girl's fall from grace, her desecent into madness, drugs, sex. It was the act of seeking herself that she actually brought her the greatest losses. She supposedly dies in the end. I saw that the book was trying to serve as a warning for kids. On the outside, I nodded in disbelief at what happened to her, but inside I loved the romance of her fall and I wanted what she had: adventure in a world without rules or care. If death or demise brought me this close to what I thought 'really living' was, I wanted in.

I was probably late for class that day. I loved how when sitting in those window seats, I could extend my legs straight up against the frame of the wooden window frame and look out the 20th century thick glass windows that would distort the kids playing frisbee in the quad below.

and today I learned it was/may be a fabrication...